April 15, 2011

How could you, Alex Proyas?!

I thought you were cool!

I liked The Crow. I actually enjoyed I, Robot on the big screen. I haven't seen Dark City yet but I've always wanted to! And now you retroactively pull this frakkery on me?!

The end of the world? The wall of numbers? The creepy little girl who can see fifty years into the future? The grade school time capsule? The solar flare of doom? The little black rocks? "Everyone Else"? The man of science estranged from his religious father? The mom who goes crazy and dies? The Adam and Eve plot? The angels aliens? The flaming deer? THIS?

My hair is a bird. Your argument is invalid.
Granted, you didn't 'shop in the bird and you didn't slap on the caption.
This didn't even happen on the set of your movie.
 But you know what really adds insult to injury? Roger Ebert liked this movie. Not only that, My Dad liked this movie.

My Dad. Liked. This movie.

My Dad, the same man who without irony* would tell us all about the Third Secret of Fatima, the truth behind the Illuminati conspiracy, and how the President of the United States was 17th in line of succession for global command behind a secret cadre of super-gazillionaires, LIKED Knowing.

Okay, granted, you weren't the screenwriter. That might give you a pass.

Still, what the hell Alex Proyas? I thought you were cool! And now I'm going to be stuck thinking every other movie you've done was a fluke*.

* I hope not.

For your sake, I pray that Garage Days turns out to be awesome.

Garage Days

P.S. They're planning a reboot of The Crow. Please do something about that.

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